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Lunchtime Apoptosis

In the hospital chair,

 

I have given myself to me for burning

though my altar is only semi-flammable and hemmed with fire doors

 

now me splayed atop it is still antiseptic and limp

rag-doll-style, though I have never played with one.

 

I understand through the diagram in false colours

that it is in purple that I am to be disposed of

 

and that it is with a mint-green helical dustpan brush untangling

that I will be splayed on slides, and my blood curdled in yellow.

 

I wish to give myself to me for emptying.

I wish to flush, at 200mg/litre, over one and

 

a half hours my veins through and through

till they are translucent and breakable